Solo moms are strong, hardworking, and resilient. And that’s just the beginning. So what does this mean? Below are three simple habits that can make you a successful solo mom. Habits practiced regularly become rituals. A successful solo mom learns to develop habits that can become rituals that build a foundation for raising your children. Whether it’s the relationship with your kids or your mindset, creating habits that lead to them becoming rituals, can be the cornerstone of successful parenting.
1. You Are Resourceful
To become a successful solo mom, you have learned to think on your feet. You usually have to make life-changing decisions on your own for both you and your kids.
Successful solo moms do not use a lack of resources as an excuse not to take action. Even when fear threatens to overwhelm you, you push through and, you overcome.
You persevere. Perseverance takes a lot of resourcefulness. You find ways to make things work. For example, you can make one meal stretch for two or three days by adding inexpensive but healthy foods like beans and shredded veggies.
You think outside the box. Even when people think you are crazy — and sometimes say it — even to your face. But who cares.
You. Get. Stuff. Done.
Your persistence and resourcefulness enhance your ability to become a successful solo mom.
2. You Have the Courage to Believe and is Ever Grateful
You find strength in not only believing in a higher power, you also believe that that higher power — God, loves you and do provide for you. Without this trust, this unwavering faith, you would spend a lot of sleepless nights wondering why your kids are not home from work yet. Wondering if they are gonna get into an accident or some other imagined danger. Instead, you are grateful for the opportunity to influence their lives. Your habit of remaining thankful, despite challenges, gives you confidence that you are okay — maybe better than okay.
Your faith gently rocks you to sleep. You kneel in prayer, asking God to take care of you and your child as he or she journey’s home from work or wherever, and then you silently fall asleep. Entwined with prayer, praying regularly, belief, and gratefulness, works to strengthen your resolve, as well as set the stage for a transformational habit for your children to follow.
Belief that God is responsible for taking care of you and your family, gives you the confidence to push forward in life as a successful solo mom. This belief brings peace of mind, that your job is protected. And if it’s not there’s always another one. You are also confident that your family is safe and protected.
Belief forms the foundation of a successful solo mom’s life. Coupled with gratitude, faith allows you the precious gift of carrying your burden with your head held high. Not because it’s not hard, but because when the challenges come, even if you fall apart at first, you eventually calm down. You come to rest in faith, while seeking ways to address the issues — utilizing your resourcefulness.
3. You Practice Regular Self Care
Habits such as maintaining a healthy weight can be incredibly difficult when we work full time because we are always exhausted. Additionally, stress, coupled with a sedentary lifestyle, cause fat to accumulate around our bellies.
Some moms successfully lose the extra weight soon after childbirth. For some of us, we carry the excess weight into our 50’s and beyond. However, the stress of single parenting can make losing weight much more complicated than usual.
Still, successful solo moms find innovative ways to eat food that increase their energy and build their immune systems. You find ways to slip healthy foods into your children’s diet. You shop when you can at the farmers market and may even utilize the convenience of membership in a Community Supported Agriculture (CSA). No excuses. Just action.
Besides, you find ways to incorporate exercise in the little bit of time you may have for yourself. You may squat while you brush your teeth or while doing the dishes. Or you will walk to the next subway stop or get off the bus a stop or two earlier. You may even park farther away from the store so you can get in some extra steps.
You may also get some exercise is by deadlifting the laundry bag instead of asking your child to do it. By chunking, successful solo moms learn how to get a surprising amount of chores done in less time.
You keep going because success dictates that you need to be healthy and strong.
These three habits, when practiced regularly, can build the foundation you need to become a successful solo mom. After all, you are not a quitter. You always find ways to grow and contribute.
Naomi Mamiye incorporated these habits while raising her four children solo. Listen to her amazing story of struggles and triumph by clicking the player below: